You won't find that in the minutes
I went to a meeting today for my new job. I don't actually start there until the 19th but my boss thought this big quarter annual meeting would be a good orientation. I left utterly exhausted, both mentally and physically.
The meeting was just under 2 hours, and typical in terms of form and content, but it made me realize in a big way how little of my brain I've been using over the past 2 years at work/ I honestly feel rusty, like parts of my head are seized from neglect.
Most of me is really looking forward to this new challenge, the day-to-day stuff is a bit rote but the big picture is incredibly fascinating and exciting! However there's a part of me that's pertrified I won't be able to shift back into mental high gear, that I've become the quintessential public servant, unable to do much more than hold down a chair, eat doughnuts and quote the collective bargaining agreement.
I'm not worried about losing my job, letting down my boss or my family. For once it's about me, I'm worried about disappointing myself.
The meeting was just under 2 hours, and typical in terms of form and content, but it made me realize in a big way how little of my brain I've been using over the past 2 years at work/ I honestly feel rusty, like parts of my head are seized from neglect.
Most of me is really looking forward to this new challenge, the day-to-day stuff is a bit rote but the big picture is incredibly fascinating and exciting! However there's a part of me that's pertrified I won't be able to shift back into mental high gear, that I've become the quintessential public servant, unable to do much more than hold down a chair, eat doughnuts and quote the collective bargaining agreement.
I'm not worried about losing my job, letting down my boss or my family. For once it's about me, I'm worried about disappointing myself.
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home